Boxers

As I stare obsessively at this thing I wrote yesterday, the pattern surrounding this page sneaks insidiously into my consciousness, looking remarkably like a pattern on a pair of boxer shorts. Very masculine, isn't it? I've never, not even once, worn boxer shorts.

If I ever wear a pair of boxer shorts and especially if they have a pattern even remotely like the one on this page, please put me out of my misery.